The Secret of the Old Clock

[banerry.livejournal.com]

Nancy pokes her nose into other people's business for the first of many times. And this book really has nothing to do with the computer game. Her Interactive lied to us. 

"It was sweet of Dad to give me this car for my birthday," she thought. "And it's fun to help him in his work." (page 1)
Oh yeah, you just KNOW she's going to be such a goody two-shoes already...
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"Her father, Carson Drew, a well-known lawyer in their home town of River Heights, frequently discussed puzzling aspects of cases with his blond, blue-eyed daughter." (page 1)
He discussed nothing with his brunette, green-eyed daughter, however. And correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't it against the law (or at least inconsiderate) for lawyers to discuss details of their cases with people who aren't involved? I want to read the book in which Carson gets sued.
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"Smiling, Nancy said to herself, 'Dad depends on my intuition.'" (page 1)
Nancy: "Teehee! He would be nothing without me!" 
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"(Crowley's) wife had died during an influenze epidemic and after that he had made his home with various relatives. According to rumors, all these people had admitted that he had paid his board and done many favors for them." (page 4)
Sexual favors. 
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"Judy began to cry. 'I'll never, never run into the road again, really I won't!' she told her aunts." (page 5)
Heh. This sort of implies that she does it all the time...
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"Nancy lapsed into silence. She felt strongly that a mystery lurked behind the Crowley case." (page 17)
Mystery-detecting powers: ACTIVATE!
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"Hannah Gruen gazed at (Nancy) affectionately and several thoughts raced through her mind." (page 21)
Hannah: "If I did it really quickly, would Carson ever find out?"
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"Becomingly dressed in a tan cotton suit, Nancy set off in her convertible for the shopping district." (page 21)
Describing her clothes/looks at every opportunity? Nancy Drew IS the ultimate Mary-Sue!
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"Ada tossed her head and her eyes flashed angrily. This did nothing to improve her looks. In spite of the expensive clothes she wore, Ada was not attractive." (page 23) 
Remember children, all ugly people are mean, and if you're nice, you will automatically be pretty.
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"... (Nancy) said, 'I'm looking for an evening dress... This torn one is very pretty. Do you think it could be mended?'
'Oh, I don't know,' the woebegone clerk wailed. 'I'll probably be held responsible and I can't afford to pay for the dress.' 
"I'm sure (the store) wouldn't ask you to do that,' Nancy said kindly. "If there's any trouble, I'll speak to the manager myself.'" (page 25)
Nancy: "This petty town OBEYS my every whim! The manager WILL do as I say!"
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"(Nancy and the sales clerk) found a vacant sitting room and Nancy took off her suit and blouse." (page 26)
HEY, now! They allowed this kind of stuff in the '30's?!
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"Nancy was too discreet to engage in gossip with the saleswoman." (page 27)
Narrator: "Nancy was too prefect to do anything even vaguely distastful, and she thrilled in hitting her reading audience over the head with her awesomeness at every opportunity." 
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"The conversation reminded Nancy of her date. She glanced at her wrist watch and saw that it was after twelve o'clock." 
'I must hurry or I'll be late for an appointment with my dad,' she told the saleswoman." (page 27)
So out loud she calls it an appointment, but in her mind she thinks of it as a date... hmmm.
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"'By the way,' (Carson Drew) said, "I haven't heard the details of the Crowley case. How are the Tophams making out?'" (page 28)
Three-way, I presume. 
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"Nancy, wearing a yellow sunback dress and jacket, hurried away to get her gloves and handbag." (page 33)
Clothing Mention #2!
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"'Pretty,' (Nancy) commented to herself. 'Oh, why can't all people be nice like this scenery and not make trouble?'" (page 34)
Because then they'd all be boring little goody two-shoes like you, Nancy. 
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(during a thunderstorm)
"The next instant, to Nancy's right, a ball of fire rocketed down from the sky." (page 37)
Sheesh! That wasn't lightning, that was an asteroid!
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"Allison spoke up. 'We don't have much company. To tell you the truth, we can't afford it.'" (page 41)
... Their guests expect to be payed for visiting? Okay, maybe they should stop inviting the hookers over for a while. 
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"'Uncle Josiah often said that we seemed like his own children,' Grace spoke up. 'He brought us many nice gifts, but we loved him for himself and not his money.'" (page 45)
Uh-huh. I'm sure that's exactly why they then go on to whine for several pages about how he didn't leave them anything in his will.
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"With the instinct of a detective who dared not miss a clue, Nancy deliberately moved closer to the bench on which the Topham girls were seated." (page 59)
Alternately: "With the nosiness of a teenager who wanted to eavesdrop on her mortal enemies..."
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"Nancy thanked the Turner sisters and said good-by. But before she could leave, Judy insisted upon showing how she could jump rope and do all kinds of dancing steps with a hoop on the lawn. 
'Judy entertains us all the time,' Mary remarked. 'We believe she's very talented.' (page 67)
Oh, yeah! With talents like that, how could she not succeed in life?
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"As (Nancy) drove off, she again hoped that money would become avaliable for a very special education for Judy." (page 67)
Didja get that? Special education.
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"(Nancy) took two more strides, but got no farther. With a fierce snarl the dog leaped on Nancy, knocking her flat!" (page 68)
Togo: the early years. 
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"Fred's bright blue eyes sparkled boyishly... At this moment another man came from the house and Fred introduced him as his brother William. Both were tall, spare, and strong-muscled. Though their hair was gray, the men's faces were youthful and unwrinkled." (page 70)
Nancy always notices things like that in older men.
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"I am Nancy Drew and I've come to help you, Mrs. Rowen." (page 72)
Actually, she's come to interrogate her, but who's counting?
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"'Why, Helen Corning!' exclaimed Nancy, as a slim, attractive school friend of hers ran up." (page 81)
I'd bet that all of Nancy's school friends are 'slim and attractive'. After all, all her enemies seem not to be.
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"'Here goes,' she thought. 'I must be subtle in this maneuver to keep from arousing the Tophams' suspicions!'" (page 82)
Narrator: "Nancy carried her pocket thesaurus with her wherever she went."
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"As she approached the house, the young sleuth heard singing. It was coming from the barn." (page 89)
Those damn cows!
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"Nancy had frequently handled motorboats and was confident she could manage this one." (page 97)
Let's face it. I don't think there's anything she can't do. 
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(while stranded on a boat in the middle of a lake)
"The hours dragged by and not another craft appeared in sight. Nancy became increasingly uncomfortable as the hot sun beat down on her. Also, she was growing weak from hunger." (page 98)
Weak from hunger? Whuh? Has she been stuck out there for two hours or two days? 
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"As Nancy turned the steering wheel, to bring the car back to the center of the narrow road, one hand accidentally touched the horn. It blared loudly in the still woods.
'That must have scared all the birds and animals.' Nancy chuckled." (page 101)
Nancy: "Teehee! Terrifying small woodland creatures is fun!"
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"When (Nancy) dared to peep through the crack a second time, she saw that two other rough-looking men had come into the room." (page 106)
Ten bucks says they're ugly. They're robbers, they're mean, and since this is a Nancy Drew book, they MUST be ugly.
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"'Get a move on!' he growled. 'We haven't got all day unless we want to be caught. That girl (Nancy) you saw, Jake, may be back any time from the shore. And she just might get snoopy.'" (page 107)
Trust me, you have NO idea.
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"'Well, you're gont to be a lot more nervous,' the man said threateningly. 'This will be the last time you'll stick your nose in business that doesn't concern you!'" (page 109)
No, it really won't be. Nobody can stop the Super-Sue and her Powers of Nosiness...
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"'Let me out!' (Nancy) pleaded. 'I'm not one of the thieves! ...' 
... The voice on the other side of the door said dubiously, 'Say, you aimin' to throw me off, imitatin' a lady's voice?' Well, it won't do you any good! No, sir. Old Jeff Tucker's not gettin' fooled again!'
Nancy decided to convice the man beyond doubt. She gave a long, loud feminine scream." (page 115)
Jeff Tucker: "Nice try, but I ain't gonna believe you're Howard Dean, either!"
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"The caretaker looked somewhat relieved. '... I can sure give a good description o' those crooks. I'd never forget their ugly faces!'" (page 117)
HA! I told you! I knew it! In Nancy Drew-verse, evil = ugly! 
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"'Surprise, Hannah darling!' Nancy gave the housekeeper an affectionate hug and kiss." (page 146)
Though after reading about the aformentioned thoughts that race through Hannah's mind when she looks at Nancy, you kinda have to wonder exactly how affectionate these hugs and kisses were...
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(just after finding the key to Josiah Crowley's safe)
"For several moments the young sleuth sat staring straight ahead of her." (page 148)
. . . Which really isn't all that unusual for Nancy Drew.
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"'What's up?' Mr. Drew asked." (page 152) 
Mr. Drew: "I'm hip!" 
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"After hastily bathing and dressing, Nancy hurried downstairs looking very attractive in a blue summer sweater suit." (page 153)
Clothing Mention #3!
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"(Nancy) kissed Hannah Gruen, who said a cheery good morning and told Nancy that Mr. Drew had already left for his office. 
'Oh dear,' Nancy said, 'I wonder if he forgot our date?'" (page 153-154)
Two dates with her father in, what, two days? Don't you think they're going at this a little too fast?
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"'Dad, when you call a meeting of all the relatives and read the will aloud,' Nancy said, 'please may I be there?'
Mr. Drew laughed. 'I'll humor you this time, Nancy. You may be present when the Tophams get the surprise of their lives!'" (page 162)
Nancy: "Heehee! I love to watch people's hopes and dreams get shattered!" 
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"'Mr. Drew is right,' the other lawyer said, after arising and looking carefully at the legal document which Mr. Drew took from his pocket." (page 171)
Legal Document: Agree with me and you won't get hurt...
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"(Nancy) was thrilled, and gazed meditatively at the old clock. Through quaint, it was not handsome, she thought." (page 179) 
Narrator: "So by definition, it was also mean." 
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"'This is the first mystery I've solved alone,' she thought. 'I wonder if I'll ever have another one half as thrilling.'" (page 180)
Um, yeah. Try 62 more, at least.     

Comments

NOTE

[banerry.livejournal.com]

I have no idea what the hell happened to this entry. I tried to fix it, and it wouldn't let me. I'll work more on it later.

[lenejic.livejournal.com]

Это прям в точку!!! Другими словами и не скажешь! :) (http://zimnyayaobuv.ru/) (http://zimnyaya-obuv.ru/)